The Feeling of Defeat

We all set goals in life and want nothing more than to achieve those goals. But, what happens when we don't? A bunch of emotions set in that all seem overwhelming and sometimes paralyzing. Leaving us in a place of frustration and confusion. Feeling less than and often times feeling defeated. How do we overcome this feeling? How do we not become stagnant worrying about the shoulda, coulda, woulda's? Focused on all of the things that we simply cannot change. I've been pondering this for a few weeks now because I have found myself struggling with this very dilemma. What seems to frustrate me more is that I believe that the goal I set was very attainable. Maybe not quite as easy as I anticipated, but definitely achievable. However, the results that I received were not quite the results I was  looking for. But, like the old saying goes, "Every cloud has a silver lining." There was definitely a lesson learned from the situation and that is what is most important. Although the desired goal was not achieved, it does not mean that it cannot be achieved. Better planning is definitely key and expecting the unexpected is important as well. 

I still struggle with what could have been, but that doesn't help the situation much. It doesn't help me to create a space of openness to what is to come because I'm too focused on the past and what I can't change. It's important to remember that looking backwards doesn't allow you to focus on moving forward. What cannot be changed must be left behind so that a space is created for what is to come. And although it sounds easy and as I type these very words to my readers out there, I still find it a struggle to not feel all of these things. Funny thing is, is that I can sit here and recognize it and see the humor in it. I'm not in denial of my flaws surprisingly. I accept them and by doing that it allows me to move forward and focus on what matters. That would seem like an oxymoron considering the fact that I can be a perfectionist in specific areas of my life. Oh the things that make my world go round.

Amazingly so, I now find myself moving towards a place of acceptance for the the journey I am now on. And that is in fact the first step in moving forward. Accepting what has happened and not happened and choosing to move forward is the most important step in the process. It shows that one does not feel defeated, but in fact empowered to push forward and continue towards the goal. There are various ways to get things done. So maybe this just means you need to re-group and create another game plan. Using what didn't work the previous time to figure out what can possibly work the next time. The failed opportunity is not really a negative thing if you really analyze and pay attention to the small lessons that come out of them. Most times it teaches you something about yourself. You gain self-awareness and are afforded the opportunity to be more aligned with what is yours by divine right. You can create another game plan that is now more closely related to who you are and what it is you need and not what you solely desire. 

In life everything is about perspective and how you react to the ups and downs of this crazy roller coaster we call life. Remember, do not let your emotions get the best of you. Making decisions in an emotional state is definitely not a good place to be in. In addition, focusing on the past doesn't leave much space for you to focus on what is to come. Be patient but diligent in making decisions and creating a game plan. Be prepared for completion of your goal but, also be mindful of hitting a couple of snags along the way. But, most importantly ALWAYS remember to KEEP YOUR HEAD UP and continue to move forward. Be GRATEFUL for every opportunity whether GOOD or NOT SO GOOD. Nothing worth having will come easy and anything easy isn't worth having. 

Until we meet again PEACE ans BLESSINGS.....

The Power Of Language

Language is more powerful than we even know. What we speak and profess with our mouth is how we shape and identify the world in which we live in. We create a linguistic box and whether we choose to believe it or not, what we speak we manifest. Not only do our actions help manifest what we want, but the words or language we use can manifest the things we want and don't want as well. That is why it is important that we SPEAK LIFE into our life.

It is time to DECLARE what you want out of life and in your life. So many times we speak more about the things WE DON'T WANT and those things are the very things that we end up giving life to. Take back the POWER that you have always had within you and begin to speak about the things you do want. But, don't just speak it, write it down so that those words can become real. Just thinking about it doesn't make it come to fruition. Create the possibilities you want by simply speaking them into the universe. Once you speak them, bring truth to them. BRING LIFE TO THEM. Once you do this a new life emerges. New possibilities for being call you powerfully into being. New openings for action call you powerfully into action. Frame the context of your words. Decide what it is that you want to accomplish. As it states in Proverbs 18:21 " Death and Life are in the power of the tongue."

There is an amazing book that I am now reading for the 3rd time by Florence Scovel Shinn called, "The Game OF Life and How To Play It. " I would strongly suggest that you read it as well. This very passage comes to mind as I am writing this blog..." Man only dares use his words for three purposes, to heal, bless or prosper. What man says of others will be said of him, and what he wishes for another, he is wishing for himself..... The body may be renewed and transformed through the spoken word and clear vision, and disease be completely wipes out of the consciousness."

Remember... SPEAK LIFE INTO YOUR LIFE. The power of words can heal and not just from within. In order to heal the body one must first heal the soul. Be empowered to SPEAK POWER. SPEAK POWER into life, into your life, and into the life of others. So I say that to say this.... BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR WORDS. BE CAREFUL with the language in which you use to create the world in which you live in. If you don't believe in the power of what you speak, then start to watch the reactions of those you speak to. I guarantee you people are listening to those very words more than you even realize. As the Good Book says..... "The tongue is mightier than the sword."

Until we meet again. Peace and Blessings.......

The Power Of Fear

Fear can be a powerful thing especially if it is what you focus on the most. It can take everything from you or it can empower and move you into Greatness. Ultimately the choice is yours. I can honestly say that Fear has definitely been a battle for me for quite some time. FEAR of the unknown, Fear of Fear (if that makes sense), and most importantly Fear of failure. I am no stranger to Fear. It has stopped me from making certain decisions, while on the flip side it has pushed me towards success. I haven't quite figured out how to NOT BE AFRAID, but I will say that it is something I work towards everyday. It has not been easy, but like the saying goes... Anything worth having isn't easy. I have always been a worry wart and I'm sure many of you can relate. But one thing I do know for sure is that Living In Fear is not living at all. It is actually quite scary. I constantly remind myself that fear isn't a good place to be and I pray that it is something that I can overcome.
So I say that to say this. DON'T LET FEAR WIN!!! Be BIGGER than your FEAR. Know that God will make a way out of NO WAY. Turn your FEAR INTO FAITH and believe that anything in this life is possible. Stand tall and remind yourself that tough times don't last but tough people do. What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. Figure out exactly what it is you want out of life and GO GET IT. Failure is not always a bad thing if you are able to learn from it. Don't stay stuck in it, but move past it. Life is a journey with many ups and downs, but the journey is always more important because it is where character and strength  is built. Speak into existence the life that you want for yourself and those around you. You are the key to your success.

Until we meet again my friends... Peace and Blessings.

The Power of Forgiveness

It's been said that forgiveness is not for the other person, but for you. There is definite power in learning to let things go. The weight that is lifted off of your soul is unexplainable. It's like the feeling you get when you make up in the morning and take a deep breathe as you are thankful for another day. Holding on to Ill feelings and emotions is not good for you. It can actually make you very sick.  It's important to remember that forgiveness is the most important step you must take in order to heal. My daughter and I had a conversation the other day and she asked me what was the difference between forgiving and forgetting and how do you accomplish that? I told her forgiveness is never for the other person. I also explained that you can forgive someone, but don't forget the lesson that was learned from the experience. We are all human beings and are bound to make mistakes and that is ok, but to be able to forgive someone wholeheartedly is a wonderful thing. It is not easy, but it is the first step in the healing process, so that you can move forward with your life and not be bound by the emotions and feelings attached to the situation.  GOD is a forgiving and merciful God, so if He can forgive you for your faults and imperfections, how can you not forgive the next person. In life we will make mistakes, but you have to be willing to forgive and move forward, and learn and be better. It's a process that starts from within.

Until we meet again... Peace and Blessings.  

Picking Your Battles

In life you will learn that not everything is worth the fight. It took me quite some time to learn that I had to pick my battles. I was told that by an elder in my mid-twenties and I thought I understood what that meant when it was initially told to me, but over the years I learned that I had no idea what was really being said. I am a very literal person, so it didn't quite resonate with me at the time. But, boy oh boy do I understand it now. I had to go through quite a few battles to finally get it right myself, and boy were there some pointless battles along the way. A lot of time and energy was wasted on things that ultimately held no REAL value or meaning to what was and is really important in this thing called life.

Over time the value of communication has been at the forefront of most things that I do because without it most relationships fail to exist in a place of HARMONY.  It becomes a place of misperceptions, misinterpretations, and miscommunication. A complete clusterfuck... (Excuse my language) but, its just a damn mess. And although chaos seems to be a definite factor in this equation, peace is something that can still be found and restored.

Often times it is difficult to see and understand the circumstance you are in while being in the midst of it. Oddly enough this is the most empowering place that you can find your center and restore your peace. It is where solace and harmony exist. Where your vision and perception of what is manifests into something far greater than what simply lays in front of you. It is where strength resides. Where awareness of self is found. It is a place where we don't necessarily want to be, but a place in which we need to be. And that is the part that many battle with, understanding the true difference between our wants and our needs. Because sadly enough what we not is not always what we need. But the ego is often times the driving force behind many of our decisions. It is the impulsive prideful side of us that thinks about the self and whether or not the decision we are about to make is going to satisfy the self. It is VERY POWERFUL... the EGO that is and it is important that we remain rational and think past the self.

Picking your battles is not always about being right, or being fair, or trying to explain your position. It's about having the ability to know that ultimately in the end, none of that truly matters. If it is not creating a resolution to the REAL matter at hand then it just isn't as important as the EGO wants you to believe. Sometimes you just have to bow out gracefully and prepare to fight another day.

Well all until we meet again..... Peace and Blessings

Transitioning to the World of the Unknown

Making moves and changing environments can be a very unsettling thing for many. It can definitely take some getting used to and unfortunately things don't always go as planned. That can be very disheartening and place you in a space of uncertainty. However, that is definitely a place in which you don't want to be. Its a place where doubt and fear reside and it is not a place of empowerment. It is an atmosphere where weakness begins to take over and consume the very essence of who you are and potentially who you are destined to be.

Transitioning is never easy and that is quite okay. It pushes you outside of your comfort zone and forces you to do something you have never done. It forces you to GET IN THE GAME and stop being a SPECTATOR. The unknown isn't bad, it's just that... the unknown. Crazy part is that most fear the unknown because it makes them uncomfortable. And human beings are definitely creatures of habit. That is something that must be changed. You have to be willing to push yourself past your normal threshold and BE GREATER, BE BIGGER, BE BETTER. You will most definitely lose some friends along the way and not everyone is meant for your journey and will not see your vision. As long as you stay focused on what the ultimate goal is, making the transition won't seem so hard after all.

I've made some recent transitions lately that have totally changed the world in which I once lived in and it is quite different for me. Some things I was prepared for and some things I indeed was not. I have prayed, cried, laughed, and rejoiced knowing that all will work out the way that it was intended. In the end it is ultimately up to me. I just have to remember what brought me here and what my end goal is. It is important for me to stay focused and remain Empowered about my decision to step outside of what I once knew and leave it all for the Unknown.

Well all until we meet again.... Peace and Blessings

New Journey

So I am embarking on a NEW JOURNEY in life and I have recently settled myself in another state. For those that truly know me, you know that I have spoken about leaving Cali for many years. The time had finally come. Or I can say that I finally took a chance and stepped out on faith. The timing was now right to make some different LIFE CHOICES. The circumstances of my life that were occurring had now changed. I stepped back and took inventory of my life and where I was at and where I wanted to go. My daughter was off in college and doing well, my grandfather was no longer here so the shared responsibility of caring for him was no longer needed, my mom was doing much better and living life well on her own, and my lil' sister was doing very good. The time had finally come for me to focus on me. Besides, my soul had been yearning for something different for sooo long. It was definitely time for change. I've heard people tell me that I am a very strong individual for taking action and creating something more, something better for myself. It's crazy because it's difficult at times to understand why they see me as such a strong individual. I think it is more about being FEARLESS and stepping out on FAITH. Ultimately, the only one stopping me from having the things I want in life is me. And while taking inventory, I had to take a hard and honest look at the role I was playing and NOT playing in the quality and happiness of my life. It was time to TAKE ACTION and make things happen. DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT so that I could get DIFFERENT RESULTS. I left everything I once knew for something NEW. It was scary and empowering all at the same time.

But, I can honestly say that it was a GREAT DECISION. I'm experiencing something new, learning more and more about myself and the people and world around me. It's definitely a learning experience and has its good days and not so good days,  but ultimately I am STANDING IN MY CHOICE. I know that GOD has my back and my front. HE knows my heart and that is well within my soul.

Well until we meet again my friends..... PEACE AND BLESSINGS....